March Round-Up
"Miaow"
GREETINGS & SALUTATIONS
In this edition:
Hi-Ho or Hi-NO?
Pitch Deck-a-rama
The head, the tail, the whole damn thing: Quint is back!
It has been a stock-taking sort of month: I’ve been busy making pitch decks for all of my “live” projects - film/TV scripts I consider finished (are they ever?), or at various stages of “in progress”. So my brain has been having a good workout this week, trying to recall what the scripts were about, and trying to translate all of the themes, target audience info and overall creative intention into something which (hopefully) will get the reader excited about all of the projects.
I’ve put them all in one handy place to view - CLICK HERE - so feel free to take a look and let me know what you think.
It was a useful distraction because not only has it renewed enthusiasm for all of the varied projects, but it has also been a chance to get to grips with what I actually get excited about with them; what their selling points are, and what I find worthwhile about them.
I even found some encouraging old reviews from Circalit, like this review for my short script version of ‘Nostalgia’: “It's one of the best short-short stories I've read.” Likewise, a review for my Mr. Mom-update ‘Viktorialand’: “I loved this story. The evolution of both characters rings true… The characters feel alive… It's funny and moves along fast. Great story.”
It’s a useful reminder that just because it hasn’t sold it doesn’t mean it’s worthless. It also reminds me that I have actually written more than two scripts in my thirty years of writing. Delving back into my scripts has been a good reminder of what I’ve achieved, but also that they’re not all dead ideas! Some scripts which I was pleased with but perhaps felt weren’t such dynamic/saleable premises contained a lot of good writing. Yes, they may need a brush-up, but they’re certainly not lost causes.
And that sums up the writing process. It takes time. Ideas need to sit for a while - sometimes years - and that’s how you find out whether they were strong in the first place. Not that a development phase is ever an option for someone writing spec scripts, but it is certainly an issue for a lot of films these days which don’t quite work: Not enough time is given over to working things through.
For now, I’m moving on to my sixth rewrite of ‘Lumen’, which up until now has been written deliberately to keep the budget low (back when I first wrote it I was trying to get it off the ground with another producer…), but instead, I’m just going to write the damn thing as it should be. Probably the best thing any writer can do…
JUST ONE MORE THING…
I want to recommend a couple of useful things: I recently subscribed to James Clear’s newsletter (author of Atomic Habits), and it’s simple-but-effective approach to provoking thoughts is brilliant. The emails aren’t bogged down with loads of info - they’re quick and easy to digest yet linger in the mind. Give it a go.
Also, try downloading the HOW WE FEEL app. You can set prompts to remind you to check in with how you’re feeling, and track the ups and downs of your emotions.
CINEMA
SNOW WHITE
There have been those seemingly performing voodoo rituals for this film to be dead on arrival - from the casting of Rachel Zegler as Snow White and Gal Gadot as the evil queen to the little people being referred to as “miners” rather than “dwarves” (because there are those who yearn for those days, apparently. Life’s just not fair if you can’t say “dwarf” anymore, evidently). So needless to say the film has had a rough ride before it even hits the screens. Just this week I saw an online chat about grown men frothing with excitement about leaving one-star reviews on IMDB because they want Snow White to be the worst-reviewed film on the site.
Sheesh.
So: Here’s an honest review. It works in some places, it doesn’t in others. Zegler and Gadot handle their roles well (their performances fit the material), some of the cinematography looks great in places, and there’s a nice kiddie appeal to it. Essentially this is Snow White for those who have never seen the classic Disney film or would find it old and outdated.
Where it doesn’t work is in the representation of the miners. It’s not that the CGI is awful - it could work well in a different movie - it just doesn’t fit this version, and the reason is there is nothing to tie it to the world the filmmakers have created. Had there been CGI characters from start to finish it wouldn’t have been so jarring, but when they arrive singing Hi-Ho Hi-Ho it is a bit like a frying pan to the face. Where did THIS come from? The miners are sort of cute and funny, but tonally all over the place.
The new songs don’t really add much, clashing somewhat with the old staple songs. Prince Charming is now a rogue-ish Robin Hood-type (but bland), and some of the smaller roles are too generic. Essentially, the film tries to be all things to all people and doesn’t add up to much when it should have invested more in specific areas. But: It is watchable. It is fine - in fact far better than Mufasa, which I found to be very dull. There’s a decent moral to the tale, and mostly harmless. But coming in the wake of Wicked there’s a sense that it could have been much more. Then again it is a film about whistling while you work.
VERDICT: Nowhere near as bad as some might say - but pretty unnecessary.
FLOW
The most successful Latvian film which also won the Oscar for best animated film this year. It’s a film in which civilisation has gone - there are no dead bodies, but clearly something has gone down - and then comes a massive tidal wave which floods everything and the waters keep rising.
A cat somehow ends up in a boat with a capybara, a dog, a lemur and a bird - and they all have to get along in order to stay alive whilst journeying towards some mythical-looking construction that stands out of the waters.
This is a million miles from Disney kiddie stuff: The animals don’t talk, they behave like, well, animals (other than mastering the skill of steering a boat). It reminded me of the game Stray - it has a similar dreamy, melancholic vibe involving a cat trying to survive.
It is a film for everyone, but perhaps not for little ones who prefer Minions and Disney. This is far more contemplative stuff. It’s philosophical, meditative, poetic, an allegory about civilisation all being in the same boat and having to work together in order to survive. It’s quirky, unusual, sad in places, and not your typical animated movie.
That said, I’m a little at odds with it winning the Oscar: If the award is given for being something different, then yes I would agree it deserved to win. But Inside Out 2 delivered much more of an emotional wallop, and had a lot more ideas and thought-provoking stuff going on. But this is the issue with awards: How can you compare two amazing works of art?
VERDICT: The sort of film that washes over you and leaves you to ponder.
TELEVISION
SKELETON CREW
This Star Wars expansion has been on Disney + for a while now, but I’ve only just found time to view it, and I’m giving it a mention here because it is a LOT of fun. Deliberately echoing 80s Amblin movies like The Goonies with an added touch of Captain Hook/Space Pirates, this is a vastly different take on the Star Wars universe, whilst still having those SW moments. It’s much more of a kiddie-friendly affair (without venturing too far into Ewoks: Caravan of Courage territory), whilst still appealing to adults. It’s the most fun a Star Wars show has been since The Mandalorian, and to paraphrase Palpatine, I will view its future with great interest.
VERDICT: HEY YOOOOU GUUUUUUUYS! *insert lightsabre swoosh*
LAST TAKE: THE STORY OF RUST & HALYNA
These days it seems like documentaries appear in record time - almost impossibly fast, which makes you question the motivation behind it other than a quick cash-in (hello Channel 5’s recent/pointless talking-heads “doc” on the Blake Lively/Oily guy fallout, and Disney+’s Death of Gene Hackman). The death of cinematographer Halyna Hutchins still feels fresh, but actually happened back in 2021.
This documentary attempts to explain how/why Hutchins’ death happened, and it does feel voyeuristic as you see events leading up to and after the fatal shooting. There are the police interviews with Baldwin and the armourer Hannah Gutierrez Reed (who, ultimately, has taken the brunt of responsibility for the use of live bullets). Whilst the doc looks into the life of Hutchins and celebrates her talent, it is ultimately the explanation of a tragedy, and there’s not much left to say other than everyone working on ‘Rust’ just wanted to make a film - and it all went dreadfully wrong.
VERDICT: Inevitably sad but essential viewing to learn from.
READING
QUINT by Robert Lautner
After grizzled shark-hunter/bait Quint said farewell and adieu to those fair Spanish ladies, a biographical manuscript was found on his soon-to-be reclaimed property. Detailing all the things you couldn’t possibly have known about Quint’s life, Lautner does a bang-up job of capturing Quint/Robert Shaw’s voice - you can hear Shaw in your head when you read about his ex-wives and heavy drinking. Of course, it’s not Jaws - the story, whatever there is, isn’t in a tearing hurry to get anywhere. It’s all about VOICE, and as a character study, it is pretty darn impressive.
VERDICT: Colourful, isn’t he?
PLAYING
DRAGON AGE: The Veilguard
I’ve only had one gaming session with Dragon Age but so far I’m very impressed: There’s a nice mix of watchable cut scenes with decent gameplay and spectacular and well-realised locations. It’s an RPG where you select the type of hero you want to be - Human, Dwarf, Elf etc. - and there’s an ancient evil fighting its way into the real world, so it’s time for the heroes to get busy with kicking their butt. With most games these days I seem to know within thirty seconds whether I like it or not, but Dragon Age stuck with me so I’m intrigued to see where it is heading.
VERDICT: Hacky slashy fantasy fun.
POWER WASH SIMULATOR: Wallace & Gromit
It wouldn’t be a monthly newsletter without mentioning another update for Power Wash Sim (which, as you should all know by now, is the best game ever created). Following on from Back to the Future and Shrek comes… Wallace and Gromit? Why not, I suppose. If you’ve played it before you know what you’re in for - if you haven’t then why not?
VERDICT: Cracking.
ON ROTATION
Here’s what I’ve been listening to this month - enjoy!
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